Nothing Is Real

Due mostly to the Russell Band, I have been listening to Russell Brand's ex-radio show recently. It was damn funny. And so it was that I found myself listening to the show wherein he and Jonathan Ross phoned up Andrew Sachs. Yes, I HAVE ACTUALLY listened to it. My knowledge is not based on articles, it is based on true fact. Also, I'm not trying to excuse them, but really, they both have the mentality of a five year old. I thought that was why a lot of people enjoy Russell's comedy. He's a comedian, by the way. Shock value is his forte. Anyway, they called up Sachs' cell, hoping he would answer but all they got was an answerphone. So they decided to leave a message. Russell, being the sort who kisses and tells had told Jonathan that he'd done Sach's granddaughter. And Jonathan blurted out "HE FUCKED YOUR GRANDDAUGHTER!" during the message. Russell's response to this was, "What?! No! No! Don't say that!" or something equivalent. They then hung up. Much later in the show, Russell and Jonathan decided to leave an apology message but that failed as well, due to a chronic lack of planning. They were quite rude. I believe they were being assholes but I don't think it had quite sunk in on them yet that this was actually someone's real answerphone. In fact, the way they phrased things (which, I will admit, made me cry with laughter) implied that they felt like this was all a silly sketch. "The only way to fix this horrible message is to leave another message." Then they left one in the form of a song, in which Russell, for some reason asked Sachs' granddaughter to marry him shortly after which Jonathan asked Sachs to marry him. Then, they realised they'd balls'd it up and they decided to leave an ACTUAL apology. ("The only way to fix this is to do the same thing we've mucked up three times already!") So they did. They left an apology. it was sort of rubbish, but that was what it was meant to be.
Terribly childish, yes, but I seriously do NOT think they deserve to be crucified. Andrew Sachs has actually accepted their apology. They have both apologized numerous times, Russell has resigned from the BBC (and excuse me for thinking this, but there go any fame chances for the Band) and they are both very sorry. Honestly. This is being taken WAY out of hand. Added to this is the fact that the show was PRE-RECORDED. Wow. Seriously. Okay, and I think that's likely the last I'll say on that.

So! Today, Paisley and I made a bowl of pudding and then ate it in Astronomy. Is that whimsical enough for you all?
Also, when I was trying to get to bed last night, I couldn't because there were a bunch of British (and Irish) comedians in my head who WOULDN'T shut up. Eventually, I wrote down some of what they said. These are more effective if you read them in the accents of the people involved. The first one is also topical. They are both quite weird.
"Look, I'm not saying that Andrew Sachs is a kind of prostitute but I am heavily implying it."--Russell Brand (Oh dear.)
"Do you know how much people have to grow to become trees. They don't. They never become trees, which I think is a comment on our society."--Dylan Moran
I then had a dream in which Fry and Laurie were in drag and talking about chins and eyebrows.

I'll leave you with that.